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The knee jerk reaction to most violent acts against men such as slapping, throwing things, biting and even cutting (use your imagination) is surprise at best and laughter at worse. The fact that women in our society are usually the physically weaker of the sexes doesn’t mean that domestic violence can not happen both ways. Women, futhermore, based on being typically physically weaker, often use other ways to “get to a man” such as with psychological abuse e.g. insults about ability as a provider economically or sexually. This is an ongoing dilemma for many men victimized by women who engage in this behavior that is often supported by society thinking includinng advertisements and movies. Men thus fact two problems in such cases – a domestic violent abusive partner and a society that is less responsive to men than women in such cases. Though men are typically stronger and do more damage in domestic violence when they are involved, it must be considered that women may be part of a problem that is neglected in domestic violence incidence.

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For instance, a child’s exposure to their father’s abuse of their mother is the strongest risk factor for transmitting domestic violence from one generation to the next.

Oh…Happy Domestic Violence Awareness Month everyone!

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Now another thing I can relate to some males with is the frustration of always being stigmatized as the perpetrator of domestic violence, regardless of who started it. Being villainized for being a male. Well, it’s more frustration at the idea of it, as I haven’t literally had a domestic violence encounter, it just seems inexplicably wrong to me for a male to always have to be the bad guy in all cases.

Domestic Violence-How It Affects Children

(PDF - 2,660 KB)
Futures Without Violence & The National Child Traumatic Stress Network (2014)
Discusses the factors that influence children’s reactions to domestic violence. This resource identifies ways in which to support health and emotional and mental development among children who have been exposed to violence.

Effects of domestic violence on children | Refuge

(PDF - 364 KB)
Futures Without Violence & The National Child Traumatic Stress Network (2014)
Examines how exposure to domestic violence affects children’s behavior, including levels of aggression and sleeping patterns.


Children and youth who are exposed to domestic violence experience emotional, mental, and social damage that can affect their developmental growth. Some children lose the ability to feel empathy for others. Others feel socially isolated, unable to make friends as easily due to social discomfort or confusion over what is acceptable. In order to respond to the overwhelming issues associated with domestic violence, child welfare professionals need to understand these issues and know how to identify them as well as assess and provide treatment to children and youth affected by domestic violence. This section provides information and resources on the impact that domestic violence has on children and youth as well as resources on how to respond it.

Witnessing Domestic Violence: The Effect on Children

(PDF - 201 KB)
Kimball & Keene (2016)
National Resource Center on Domestic Violence
Examines the effect of domestic violence across the lifespan, with particular attention paid to mental health and suicidality.